RIP Lufuno

Hello my lovely readers. I missed you all so much. I hope you are all doing fine. I just wanted to write a post in regards to the tragic incident of the late Lufuno Mavuhnga who took away her own life due to bullying. The fact that she was bullied because of her looks still breaks my heart. My condolences to her friends and family.

WHY DO I WRITE?

I strongly believe that we are all one people so the South African girl is just like a sister to me despite being Kenyan and that is why I chose to be part of this conversation.

NORMALIZATION OF BULLYING

As a dark skinned woman who was severely bullied due to my looks(dark skin tone) growing up, I really do understand the extent, detriment and heartache that comes along with being bullied especially on features that are ascribed to us by God Himself. This ranges from weight, height, skin color, hair type, race etc.

Honestly we really need to do better. Colorism is real and so is bullying.

Bullying dark skinned women is so normalized such that if we address it we most certainly get bullied even more and or nobody stands up for us. People bully dark skinned women for bleaching, remaining dark skinned, using filters and for so many other reasons.

Is the Argument redundant? Yes and No (It depends on how you perceive the issue)

I know my argument might sound redundant at this point but please stop bullying please because they have a dark skin tone. It is regressive and pointless.

It is so deep. It is still an issue that needs concise efforts and intentional conversations. We cannot afford to keep hurting and losing girls to this evil and regressive hierarchy of who is who based on skin tone.

Why it may seem redundant?

DEFLECTION

The argument may seem to be stretched out and meaningless because some people have normalized bullying of dark skinned women such that if people address it they are received with a ton of deflection and further bullying, you are just a bitter, self conscious, insecure and ugly dark skinned woman, that is why you speak about it. Stop using filters, fix yourself first and the list is endless. This dilutes the weight of the real issue.

CONCLUSION

What can we do?

We can collectively choose to stop glorifying bullying in any space including schools, work place and most especially, in social media platforms.

Choose kindness. It is free. I mean if you are well aware that a dark skinned woman bears the brunt of colorism almost daily, why bully her about the same and then ask her ‘to fix herself?’

Set up practical life skills programs in schools and encourage students to report bullying incidences.

Thanks so much for reading. See you next time. Goodbye. Kindly watch and sub to my channel. I address colorism there too.

Filters v Colorism

Excuse me, This is not my real face.

I know I am one day late. Please forgive my inconsistency ‘juu ninastruggle’. So, this post is based on what one of my friends asked me to write about. He asked me to write about colorism and filters.

FILTERS

If you have used your phone camera, you have probably come across the filters option. This option is not only tied to the phone default settings. They are also available on almost all applications including the most popular ones; Instagram, Snapchat and whats app.

I really don’t know the specific reason as to why they were created in the first place. I geuss they were meant to help us switch things up, make our pictures look better or maybe make us look prettier, not pretty but you get the point.

My favorite filter is the snapchat flower filter and the dog filter. Feel free to drop your favorite filter on the comment section.

COLORISM

Light skinned women use filters and become lighter. Well now you know.

Most of these filters make dark-skinned women including myself appear shades lighter. Kenyans actually bash dark skinned women who use filters and look lighter in pictures than in person but also bash dark skinned women for posting themselves without filters.

So you can as well use multiple filters in one pic if you want. Do you sis.

In my opinion, I think it is perfectly okay to use filters on pictures. Filters makes everybody look a bit different from their ‘real face’. It is all about the intention of the filter. Even light skinned women use filters and face tune but nobody wants to address that. It is only a problem when a dark skinned woman does it.

Yeah you got it, that is colorism.

SOLUTION

If you are a dark skinned lady who uses filter so that you can ‘feel prettier and reach the light skinned standard of beauty’ just take some time to do the work. You can take time to understand and find the root of your thinking. You might ask yourself ‘why do I have the incessant need to look lighter every time I take a picture?

‘Why do I just want to be light skinned ?’ Once you answer this question and the answer sounds like ‘I do not look good enough as a dark skin on pics or I look better with filters because of my skin tone’ then try to be more kind to yourself and cultivate a culture of self love. You might be using them to cover for self hate.

If you use filters just because… or you use filters because they were created so that we can use them….you are good. If you can comfortably take pictures with/without filters or use filters that maintain your skin tone then you are doing just fine. I actually like when filters maintain my dark skin tone but I also like those that do not maintain the dark skin tone . I am just saying.

Blogmas Edition! Day 28

Elsa Majimbo and colorism

Hello everyone, I hope you are all doing well. Today, I came across some tweets calling out Elsa Majimbo for addressing colorism on Naomi Campbell’s interview. So I decided to write down a commentary on it.

Earlier on, I had a post touching on colorism and Elsa Majimbo. Feel free to check it out.

Edit Post ‹ Vert Berry — WordPress.com

GASLIGHTING

Now some Kenyans went ahead and attacked Elsa for addressing colorism on the show. They have compared her to Rono (a popular dark skinned, female Kenyan comedian). Some have compared her sentiments to the colorism Edwin Butita has experienced before, but nobody asked Elsa how colorism affected her career. Nobody asked Elsa how colorism mentally affected her. The Kenyan netizens only cared about the ‘disrespect on an International level’ but ignored the fact that she struggled with colorism.

People just jumped into ‘nobody has ever hinted on colorism about you in this app’ bandwagon. It is very clear that Kenyans hate to admit the fact that colorism is a real problem that should be addressed head on.

It seems Kenyans want Elsa’s approval more than learning from her and analyzing the hurdles she had to deal with (colorism included) before achieving so much. Some are now bashing dark skinned women and calling them ‘churas’ (frogs) because Elsa addressed colorism.

One netizen tried to be funny and stated that Elsa is maybe trying ‘dark humor.’ Kenyans have an ugly habit of demeaning dark skinned women and denying it simultaneously. They make colorist jokes and throw the ‘dark skinned women are so angry and sensitive, kwani hamjui jokes?‘ statement like confetti.

It is 2020 and dark skinned women can tell the difference between a joke and an insult.

CONCLUSION

Comparing Elsa to Eddy Butita and Rono is pointless. Trying to invalidate her experience with colorism via unsolicited comparisons is a gaslighting technique that needs to be left in 2020.

People should learn to listen to the colorism issues faced by dark skinned women without judging, comparing and or invalidating.

Colorism is real. Stop invalidating this issue.

Bye everyone! I will see you on the next post.

Blogmas Edition! Day 20

Poll

Hey everyone. My apologies I am slacking. My mental health has been on the rocks of late and so my level of consistency ha dropped but we move regardless.

So today I just want to ask you guys what you would like to read on the blog. Any suggestions are welcome.

Thanks for reading and I hope to meet you at the comment section.

Day 19! Blogmas Edition

Majesty Bahati; Bullying children on colorism

Hello everyone, on this post, I am going to share my thoughts on bullying children based on colorism.

Kenyans have a habit of bullying people online including children. Recently, the netizens bullied Majesty Bahati for being darker than what he actually appears to be.

Below are some comments on the post shared by Diana Marua( mother to Majesty Bahati);

MAJESTY 👑 (@majestybahati) • Instagram photos and videos

Kumbe mnakuanga rangi tofauti ni filters tu ndio mob

Mmekuwa weusi haraka aje?

Uko na stress leo mpaka umesahau filter mumekuwa weusi 😂😂

My thoughts

Bullying children due to colorism is very harmful to their self esteem and it can potentially affect them in their adulthood.

People attach suffering and stress with dark skin and that is a stereotype that should be thrown in the bin.

Kenyans need to stop colorism and realize that making fun on people based on their skin tone is unnecessary.

See the source image

Bye and I hope to see you in the next post!

Day 18! Blogmas Edition

Can we be friends?

Hello, everyone I hope you are all doing fine. On this post I am going to write about something that I find very controversial and I would really appreciate if you engage me on your thoughts.

So I heard somebody say that some skinned women cannot be friends with light skinned women because of jealousy. Apparently dark skinned women are always jealous of light skinned women therefore, meaningful relationships cannot be achieved.

On the flip side, some people argue that some light skinned women like being friends with dark skinned women so that they can ‘outshine them and thus boost their self esteem.

I honestly think these are false misconceptions that people use to fuel the toxicity of colorism. I am dark skinned and I have heard and still have light skinned friends whom I really love.

I think friendships based on genuine love and appreciation supersede these standards that people set especially when it comes to girlfriends.

What do you guys think?

See you on the next post. Bye!

Day 17! Blogmas Edition

Corrective promotion for dark skinned women; Matata, Gengetone love

Hello everyone, I hope you are al doing fine. On this post I am just going to share pure excitement.

Everytime I see artists especially artists from my home country (Kenya) promote dark skinned women in a positive and desirable light contrary to presenting them as the butt of the joke, I get very happy.

Matata, a Kenyan musical group (boy band) is particularly great at promoting dark skinned women in a positive light. They do not have dark skinned women appearing in their videos as ‘extras’ or ‘the I am trying too hard’ vixens. They have dark skinned women who are the stars of the videos. I honestly appreciate it.

They actually practice chivalry towards the dark skinned women on their videos. Since our behaviors and habits do not exist in a vacuum, I am pretty sure their videos will influence people to realize that dark skinned women can also be feminine, delicate and worthy of princess treatment.

Below is the video, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Day 14, Blogmas edition

Yvonne Okwara’s take on colorism

Hello everyone, I hope you are all doing well. On this post, I am going to share my thoughts on what Yvonne Okwara’s (a Kenyan news anchor on Citizen TV) sentiments on colorism in the Kenya media spaces.

This is what Yvonne Okwara had to say about colorism;

My thoughts on the above video:

  1. I am happy that Yvonne addressed the issue which many people consider non-existent or exaggerated.
  2. Dark skinned people bear the brunt of being associated with the most hideous traits and that needs to stop.
  3. The media needs to value and embrace representation and inclusivity in all dimensions.
  4. Colorism is not an illusion. It is a real thing.
  5. Yvonne was very right on what she said about the issue.

Parting shot

It would be very helpful if more people especially Kenyans, would engage in honest conversations surrounding colorism, since the first step to solving a problem is the acceptance and acknowledgment of the issue.

Thanks for reading, see you on the next post.

Bye!